Kiiroo Onyx 2 —— $219.00
Hello again! I’m here to talk about the Kiiroo Onyx 2.
I confess; I’m a wanker. I know that word is often used as a put down, particularly where I come from. I’m originally from the UK, Manchester to be precise, but have been in the US since I was 13. But I’m proud of my masturbation skills. I’ve been pullin’ my pud since I was just a lad and I’m now 35.
Get this, my da caught me wankin’ away like the little pervert I was when I was just eleven. Embarrassing, huh? Actually, it was OK. I think he was as embarrassed as me. Anyhow, after that he and I have been able to talk quite openly about sex, which, I think, has been good for both of us.
So, I’m proud to say that I’m a connoisseur of playing with myself. I’ve tried numerous strokers and masturbators in my time. I know what works and what don’t work. With that then, let’s take a look at the Onyx 2. There’s lots to see.
I’m going to start with the box. Onyx 2 comes in a very sturdy white cardboard with a picture of the product on the front. The sides and back are plastered with little icons that tout the many different features of the Onyx 2. Little descriptors come in seven languages. All the packaging is recyclable, which is good and environmentally responsible.
Inside the box you will find the Onyx 2, a USB charging cable (This thing is rechargeable.), a little instruction manual in many languages, a warranty/registration card, a Fleshlight SuperSkin insert (Lots more about this to come.), and a free trial for FeelMe. (Porn that can sync with the Onyx 2).
First things first. Ya gotta charge the Onyx 2 for 4-6 hours before use. There’s an easy to access covered port near the base of the unit. You’ll get about an hour of play on a full charge.
While the unit is charging you can begin to set it up for use. Here’s where things get a little tricky.
The Onyx 2 has a removable cap on the bottom. Lifting the cap is easy. Once the cap is removed you can see the space-aged innards. It’s very cool. Now ya have to carefully pry off a plastic lip so that you can insert the Fleshlight sleeve. This wasn’t as easy as I hoped. The plastic is thin, and I was afraid I was going to break it if I pried too hard. In the end it came off just fine.
Next I opened the sealed packet containing the Fleshlight sleeve. This is where my problems began.
I used to own a Fleshlight. I thought it was brilliant at first. But, after a few uses, the SuperSkin insert began to deteriorate. Unlike silicone, SuperSkin is porous, contains phthalates, and is not hypoallergenic. Cleaning it is a headache and even if you’re careful washing and drying it, it won’t last like silicone. And don’t even think about sharing a SuperSkin toy.
When I opened the sealed packet containing the Fleshlight sleeve I was shocked to discover that the insert had melted into itself. Very disappointing! I know what the sleeve was supposed to look like, a condom sized ribbed insert, because I saw pictures of it online. (See the photo above.) Mine didn’t look anything like this picture. Mine was a white blob. I carefully tried to pull the sticky mess apart. (Had it been in its package too long?) SuperSkin is really stretchy, so I was partially successful in pulling it into shape. I say partially because I tore two little holes in it with my effort. Frankly, after this irritating little adventure, I wanted to walk away from this whole exercise.
Why in the world would a company make a $200+ engineering marvel of a toy and have the use of the toy depend on a crummy, yeah, I’m gonna say it, unhealthy insert? What, a silicone insert, one that would be easy to clean, wouldn’t degrade, and be easy to use over and over again, and that would be nonporous, phthalate-free, and hypoallergenic, wasn’t available? Disappointed!!
OK, so I finally get the sleeve stretched out to the best of my ability and slip it into the core of the Onyx 2. Now I had to arrange the base of the sleeve on the top of the unit so that I could replace the plastic lip. This is supposed to keep the sleeve in place while in use. This step is way easier said than done. The SuperSkin is a bit greasy so it was a struggle to get it into just the right position for the plastic lip to hold it and snap back into place.
Once I finally had the Onyx 2 set up I replaced the cap and let it finish charging. I was glad for this hiatus because my libido was tamped down big time after all the struggle to get this fuckin’ thing set up. No toy, especially a very expensive toy should be this troublesome, if ya ask me.
The next day I approached the Onyx 2 again. I had my water-based lube in hand (You can only use water-based lube with SuperSkin.) and I was ready to bust a nut.
Just so you know, you can either just switch on the unit and use it in manually, (You control the speed and sensations using the touch-sensitive strip on the front.) or you can check out some interactive porn using the FeelMe site.
I chose the first option. I wanted to get a feel, so to speak, for what the Onyx 2 could do on its own. I had to use a lot of lube to get started. This got a bit messy, as I knew it would. I prepared by having some wipes ready to clean my hands throughout. Otherwise using the control panel, or even holding the thing, would have been difficult.
(If you’re going the interactive route, you have to install the FeelMe app from your app store, pair your device with the app, and then navigate your way to an interactive porn site.)
The Onyx 2, once it is set up, is basically a hands-free device. It does all the work for you. It will literally rub one out for you without even thrusting. Cool. It’s pretty lightweight, comparatively speaking, and quiet too.
I watched some of my own go-to porn and had a very satisfying orgasm. So YAY for that!
After my session was over, I removed the plastic lip which was holding the Fleshlight sleeve in place and pulled out the insert. I had every intention to try to clean it for another use, but to my dismay, there was lube all over the inside of the core. I know, I know, it was my fault. I used the Fleshlight SuperSkin sleeve even though I had punctured it when I was trying to stretch it out. What a bummer. Now I had to clean out the core.
This did nothing for my post-orgasm afterglow.
I looked on the Kiiro site for replacement sleeves for the Onyx 2, but couldn’t find any. There were replacement sleeves available for one of their other products, but not for the Onyx 2. So now what’s a person to do?
Because I’m a plucky little wanker, I didn’t let the SuperSkin debacle get me totally down. The next time I tried the Onyx 2 I wore two condoms on my willy and slipped it onto the Onyx 2’s core so I could enjoy the great sensation it had to offer. This worked out OK, but wasn’t optimum. I don’t think I should have to improvise with a product that costs over $200.
I know that the Onyx 2 has other capabilities, like connecting with a partner and her toy, but I didn’t go there. Mainly because my wife would have had to have her own interactive toy. (Actually, she noticed all the problems I was having in setting up and using the Onyx 2, and she didn’t want to add to my frustration.) And, of course, I had no sleeve.
Here are my final thoughts. I think the Onyx 2, is a brilliant concept. It’s relatively quiet and rather lightweight for the great sensations it can deliver. The SuperSkin insert was a disaster.
If/when the Kiiro folks ever decide to jettison the Fleshlight connection and get themselves a good silicone insert I will eagerly revisit the Onyx 2. Until that time, it will sit idle because I don’t have another usable insert. And the whole bloody thing is useless without a sleeve.