Sex In A Can by Fleshlight

There’s something brand-spankin new goin on at Fleshlight.   Here’s Brad to tell us all about it.

Sex In A Can:  Spread Eagle Brew —— $39.95

The Fleshlight company has been around for a lone time.  They make the legendary Fleshlight and Fleshjack.  I’m the proud owner of my very own Fleshlight; it is my go-to toy for spankin the monkey.  I never get tired of my Fleshlight and I wouldn’t give it up for the world.  That’s way I wanted to review their new product:  Sex In A Can.large_1759

I am of the mind that foolin’ around with or trying to improve on a great product, an icon even, will sure enough just fuck things up.  I just couldn’t see why the Fleshlight people were tempting fate by bring out Sex In A Can.  But I promised Dr Dick that I would set aside my preconceived ideas and approach this new product with an open mind.

Damn!  I’ll be the first to admit, I was totally off base in thinking the iconic Fleshlight couldn’t be improved upon.  Wait, improved is not the word I’m looking for, because Sex In A Can doesn’t really improve on the original design, it just gives the consumer yet another option.

Those of you familiar with Fleshlight will know that every customer can pretty much customize every aspect of the unit he wants to buy.  They have several “orifice” options: pussy, mouth, asshole or “neutral”. The plastic case comes in silver, black or clear. The insert comes in different colors, and there are several different internal contours for the insert itself.

Sex In A Can is basically just another option in terms of size and shape.  Here’s what I mean. Sex In A Can is shaped like a tallboy beer, instead of the traditional oversized Fleshlight shape.  It is lighter, more compact, less expensive, yet it has all the features of its big brothers.

There are three brand new “orifice” options — two different pussies (Mmmm, pussies!) and a mouth.  Three new insert contours too.  Everything else — including the patented Superskin insert remains the same. The plastic case, the thing that looks like a tallboy beer, has removable caps at both ends, as does the Fleshlight. The top cap covers the head of the insert and keeps it clean when your dick’s not in it.  The end cap can also be removed for easy cleaning.

Just like the Fleshlight, ya gotta loosen the end cap a bit before you attempt to stick in your dick.  Sex In A Can is a whole lot tighter than my stalwart Fleshlight.  In fact, bein the hefty-cock brother I am, it was a very tight squeeze.  I had to use a shitload of lube just to get me started. Oh, and by the way, you can only use water-based lube with all the Fleshlight Superskin products.  Here’s a tip:  you adjust the suction created inside Sex In A Can by either loosening or tightening the base cap.

Clean up is a super-easy. A little soap and water will do the trick.  But once the insert is dry, you have to dust it, inside and out, with a little cornstarch, or body powder. This will help keep things as fresh as the day you got it.

My Sex In A Can:  Spread Eagle Brew, came with the Pink Spread Lady orifice; (Mmmm, pussies!) mini vortex insert; the cleverly designed beer can case; and sample packet of lube.

I like to soak my Superskin insert in warm water before I begin my stroke session.  This makes the already flesh-like insert even more life-like. It’s totally awesome; it feels like the real thing.

One thing you should be aware of.  There’s an off-gas that come from Sex In A Can when you first open it.  This, I’m sorry to say, is an unfortunate by-product of manufacturing super soft rubbery things like the insert.  It’s kind of like the same smell you get with a new carpet.  Just let it air out for a while before you use it.  Or you can just go ahead and wash the whole blasted thing before ya use, like I did.  Which is a good practice for any new sex toy.

There’s no gettin around it,Sex In A Can is great.

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Beer Babe Vagina

Beer Babe Vagina Precious Pink                $20.94

Chuck

This here is the Beer Babe Vagina in what they call Precious Pink.  It also comes in, god help us, Raunchy Red.

I’m gay!  So right off the bat, the promotional pitch for this product didn’t appeal to me.  Seems to me Synergy SYN1700002_1Erotic is needlessly eliminating a whole bunch of potential queer customers with this approach, but that’s just me.  I do love a good masturbating sleeve.  So even if it looks like a cunt, I won’t hold that against it.  I mean once I get goin, I’m not gonna notice the configuration of the orifice.

The Beer Babe gets high marks for creativity.  I mean besides it looking like a bottle of beer, the copy on the label is a hoot.  “Superb Jackability” on the front.  And on the back:  “Prolonged use of this item may cause pleasure, stimulation and finally ejaculation!  Use of suitable water-based lubricants and appropriate visual ages is highly recommended.  Deposit Required!”

It says that it’s 9” fleshy inches.  But that’s simply not true.  The whole bottle is 9 inches. And no one’s dick, least of all mine, would fit in the bottle’s neck.  Besides, the “fleshy” insert is only 6 inches.  And while that might suit most guys; if you got anything over a 6 inch boner, the head of your dick is gonna get jammed up against the tapering neck of the bottle.  OUCH!

Vigorous thrusting, the kind I like, will also dislodge the fleshy insert from the hard plastic bottle.  This is frustrating in the extreme.

When I first took this thing from its packaging and opened the base to look inside, a wave of noxious fumes came from within.  WTF?  I mentioned this to Dr Dick and he said that’s called off-gas.  Which is a nasty by-product of manufacturing. I wasn’t about to stick my dick in there till I eliminated the smell. I soaked the entire unit, inside and out, in hot soapy water first, to rid it of the smell.

After only one attempt at squeezing one off with the Beer Babe ; I gave up.  Like I said, the insert kept separating from the bottle shaped holder.

Imagine if this company invested more money into making a better product, one that actually worked, lasted and manufactured it with materials that didn’t smell bad.  Like I said, I love a good masturbation sleeve.  I’d happily pay good money for a quality product.  In fact I have!  I am the proud owner of two Fleshlights.  Now there’s a good product!

WhackSock

Sex Fans, The Dr Dick Review Crew has something totally wacky for ya today.  It’s a WhackSock!  Say WHAT?  You heard me; a WhackSock.  It’s a sock ya wear on your cock when ya wank. How fun is that?  I guess it’s intended to keep your spooge off the furniture, don’t’ cha know.

This week’s Review Crew:

  • Glenn & Hank

WhackSock 6 pack        $9.99

Glenn:  “I got this huge smile on my face today, because I had a flashback to when I was a kid.  I started masturbating when I was 11, but nothing came out till I was almost 13.  Before I was able to ejaculate I could cum multiple time in one session.  But once I started to shoot a wad when I wanked I could only cum once per session.  Actually, I only had to wait a few minutes before I could resume my diddling.”
Hank:  “I think they call that the ‘refactory period’.  It’s part of a male’s sexual response cycle.”
Glenn:  “Yeah, I know that!  So as I was saying, before Professor Bingo over here interrupted me, I was surprised as all get out when I shot my first spunk.  I thought I had injured myself.  Since I was totally unprepared for the eruption I had to do something with the evidence ASAP.  My mother would soon round the corner and come barging into my room.”
Hank:  “Did she bust you spankin’ the monkey?”
Glenn:  “Not that time, I’m happy to say!  It took some quick thinkin on my part.  But I label_low_20rez_1_-276x350discovered that ya could hide your boy juice in a dirty sock, and your old lady wouldn’t be the wiser.”
Hank:  “Damn, you’re clever!  I’d be willing to bet the just about every guy on the planet has dropped a load into a sock at one point or another.”
Glenn:  “Yeah, it’s probably something in our DNA, huh?  So anyway, that’s why I had to laugh when Dr Dick asked us to review the
WhackSock.  My masturbation-obsessed youth came flooding back to me.”
Hank:  “I know, I used to discard the socks I busted a nut in.  I was afraid my mom would find me out.  This, of course, backfired one day when my ever-vigilant mother uncovered a tangle of crusty socks in the trash.  It didn’t take her long to put two and two together.  This precipitated the big ‘sex talk’ with mommy that make my skin crawl.  I was also marched off to confession to tell the priest about my disgusting and sinful behavior.”
Glenn:  “I’ll bet the priest got off on that, huh?”
Hank:  “Probably!  I was a strappin’ young lad of over 6’ tall with ragin’ hormones and an unruly big dick.  I was hung over 8” when I was just 15. It was so embarrassing, because I used to pop wood at the drop of a hat.  I though having a big, precum drippon’ dick was a curse.”
Glenn:  “Glad you got over that, cuz I love your one-eyed monster.  But we digress!  Let’s get whacksockback to the WhackSock. It’s a specifically designed cottony sock made for male masturbation.  At least that’s what it says on the
WhackSock site.”
Hank:  “Yep, it’s basically a tubesox; no bigger than what a young kid might wear on his feet.  But it does stretch.”
Glenn:  “And that’s where the fun began for us.  Hank and I went to a costume party last month and our costumes consisted of a
WhackSock and nothing more.  Hank’s trouser snake was the life of the party, literally and figuratively.”
Hank:  “The stretchy cotton material could barely contain my johnson, so to speak.”
Glenn:  “And it was all over when he got a boner!  I loved it.  I got to tell everyone that I am the lucky man that gets to have that hog up my ass whenever I want it.  Tell me that didn’t make me the envy of all the queens at the party.”
Hank:  “When we got home from the party, we both blissfully beat off into our
WhackSock, just like god intended.”
Glenn:  “The
WhackSock makes the perfect gag gift.  Imagine how this little number will crack up the party.  And you know for certain that there will always be at least one dude in the crowd that will want to put it on his pecker, right then and there.  Or you could get a bunch of WhackSocks and have a WhackSock party.  All attendees must wear a WhackSock and nuttin’ else.  It’ll be a freakin’ orgy in no time at all.”
Hank:  “And it feels real good goin up and down my shaft.  It’s almost like having a lubed hand.  And your
WhackSock is like totally reusable.  It’s like having a form-fitting trick towel.”
Glenn:  “Be the first one on your block to own a pair (or 6) of these.”

ENJOY

Fleshlight, FleshJack

FleshJack Ice—— $69.95

So sex fans, I suppose ya’ll all know that the Fleshlight has been around for several years now, right? Good, I figured you would’ve noticed. I mean a person can hardly visit a sex related site these days without seeing one of their fetching ads. I realize that I’m a Johnny-cum-lately with my review, but like my momma always used to say — “all good things come to those who wait”.

Like you, I’ve seen the Fleshlight around for years.  And because of that I convinced myself I knewproduct_aajack_440.jpg everything there was to know about the device. After all, I visited their websites loads of times. I watched their beautifully produced and very sexy mini-movies (more times than I care to say). And I even interviewed a bunch of satisfied customers. I confess, even though I never actually held a Fleshlight in my hand, I imagined I knew everything there was to know about a Fleshlight. I mean hey, it’s not like I never used a masturbator before. How different could this one be?

Well, so much for baseless assumptions.

Imagine my surprise when my very own personal FleshJack Ice showed up on my doorstep. I discovered that just about everything I thought I knew about this marvel didn’t even come close to the real thing. Until I had one of my own to fondle and probe…if ya catch my drift, I was clueless. It’s true what they say; this is the granddaddy of male stimulators. But you really shouldn’t take my word for it.

My initial piece of advice to everyone in my audience is; don’t be a smug jerk like me. That’s right! If you’ve never had your grubby paws on, or your hot little boner in, an actual Fleshlight, you pretty much don’t know nuthin’ about a Fleshlight. Period!

icejack_tommyd.jpgThe first thing that struck me about the Fleshlight is it’s way bigger and heavier than I imagined. I figured it would be the size of a regular flashlight. I was wrong. The plastic shell is a serious 10” in length. And by it’s self it’s fairly light. It’s the totally amazing Superskin™ insert that racks up the weigh. My Fleshlight weighs in at a hefty 1 pound, eight and a half ounces. And that, sex fans, is a handful, or two, for damn sure. More about this in a minute.

The Superskin™ insert is totally amazing. It begs to be touched and caressed. It is unlike any other texture I’ve experienced in a sex toy. And like I said, I’ve had an opportunity to test drive a bunch of masturbators and stimulation sleeves in my time. The Superskin™ is kinda like a jelly, but it’s so much more substantial. I know this is gonna sound trite, but it does feel flesh-like. And if you add some hot water to your Fleshlight, as I did, before you sink in your chub, well it’s pretty much the most amazing feeling you can have from something that simulates a human orifice.

And ya wanna talk marketing genius? All Fleshlight customers are invited to customize their unit before they buy. And that is where the fun begins. Since most guys are pretty particular about where they stick their joystick, Fleshlight has cleverly come up with several “orifice” options: pussy, mouth, asshole or “neutral” (apparently for those who can’t commit). The plastic case comes in silver, black or clear. There are optional insert colors too: pink, mocha or ice. And get this, you can even choose from among six different internal contours for the insert itself: Original, Super Tight, Ultra Tight, Speed Bump, Super Ribbed and Wonder Wave. If, with all these options, you can’t design the perfect Fleshlight for you, you’re just too damned fussy.

I want to draw your attention to one last feature before we take this puppy on a test drive. The plastic case, the thing that looks like a flashlight, has removable caps at both ends. The top cap covers the bulbous head of the insert and helps keeps it clean when it’s not in use. The end cap can be removed for easy cleaning. (The jizz-fanatics among us will appreciate this, because when a wank session is over, you can simply dribble out your spunk for some delicious DNA play.)

Like I suggested above you can also add hot water through the end cap for a warm, squishy jack. If you do add water, don’t over-fill the blasted thing. No more than three-quarter full is my suggestion. And this is best done in the shower or bath. Because, depending on the vigor of your stroke, things will get might wet, which just so happens to add to the fun. Just so you know, this was my favorite way to Fleshlight!

When the end cap is sealed tightly, it’s a lot more difficult to plug in your pud…even with loads of lube and a major stiffy. I found that if I loosened the cap, just until I got situated, as it were; I could then tighten the cap to make for a swell little vacuum sensation. Very nice! I wonder if that was intended in the design, or simply is a happy accident?

By the way, you should only use a water-based lube with your Fleshlight. And clean up is a snap. A little soap and water will do the trick. Here’s a tip: once the insert is dry, dust it, inside and out, with a little cornstarch based body powder. This will help keep things as fresh as the day you got it.

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I always like to take my time with a new toy. Ya know, to get a sense of how the thing works and feels. This was particularly the way to go with the Fleshlight. Masturbating with one of these puppies has several advantages to your basic hand job. First, there is a delightful silkiness, and a tight consistent pressure on your cock throughout each stroke. In this regard — and despite the claims made by the Fleshlight marketing department — pluggin’ a Fleshlight is very different than pluggin’ any human orifice I know. But that’s not a bad thing, mind you. Consider the guy who is dealing with premature ejaculation, for example. I’m positive that if he used a Fleshlight to train himself to last longer, he’d have way more success than if he just used his hand. This is an ideal device to practice delaying one’s orgasm, which will make you a much better lover. And you can bank on that!

Remember I mentioned the heft of the Fleshlight? I want to get back to that now. Because the unit is heavier then other masturbators, one can actually fuck it, as well as have it fuck you. Here’s what I mean. If you’re lying on your back, and you’re using your hand (or hands) to pump the Fleshlight up and down your rod; it’s basically fuckin’ you, right? I discovered that if I tilted the Fleshlight a bit, up, down or to one side or another, I was able to stimulate different areas of my cock. Using a corkscrew motion was way wonderful too.

Now, if you stick the Fleshlight between your mattress and box spring, for example, then you can fuck it. I really got off on doing deep thrusts this way. And because of the ingenious bulbous head of the Superskin™ insert there’s no way I could injure myself on the hard plastic case with those deep hard manly thrusts. 😉

One final thing, ya’ll know I’m a real big advocate of partners masturbating together. There is just so much one can learn by watching a partner pleasure him/herself. The Fleshlight is the perfect male masturbator for this purpose. It’s playful and non-threatening, so it will be easier to get your partner to join in the fun and learn about your sexual response all at the same time.

ENJOY