Best Adult Products List For 2012

For those of you who missed my Final Podcast of 2012 — Podcast #357, posted last Wednesday, 12/19/12, it’s time to announce this year’s Best Adult Products List For 2012.

We have five categories this year — The Best Product or Toy for Men; The Best Product or Toy for Women; The Best Product or Toy for Couples; The Best Kinky Product or Toy; and The Best Lube or Lotion.

We reviewed some amazing adult products and sex toys this year in all five categories. So coming up with the very best in each category was a bit of a challenge. But despite the difficulty we completed our list and here are members of the Dr Dick Review Crew to reveal the winners.

Jada with The Best Product or Toy for WomenBloom.

Leaf-Bloom-Hand

Mick & Chuck with The Best Lube or LotionCumShotLube.

cum-Shot-Lube-clean

Jack & Karen with The Best Product or Toy for CouplesWE VIBE 3.

we-vibe-3-couples-450x470

  • We have a tie for The Best Kinky Product or Toy for 2012, and curiously enough, they both come from the same company, the wonderful folks at Spareparts.

Carlos with the Deuce Male Harness.

Deuce02

Christa with the Joque Harness.

spareparts Joque

Glenn and Hank with The Best Product or Toy for MenFat Boy Cock Extender.

Fat Boy03

Tiani by LELO

Tiani by LELO —— $145.24

Jada
I used to have an almost reverential admiration for the LELO brand. The Dr Dick Review Crew has reviewed numerous products from their line. You can see all our reviews HERE! Anyway, way back when, LELO was on the vanguard of exceptional pleasure products. But something tells me they are slipping farther and farther off the cutting edge.

Nowadays, there are more than a few companies that are producing remarkable toys. The Leaf brand jumps immediately to mind. And most of these companies also have a social conscience, at least in terms of their packaging and the like, which leaves LELO in the dust.

Take today’s product, the Tiani, as an example of what I am talking about. I was delighted I was asked to review this product and I wanted to like it way more than I could. So you have to know that I had a decidedly positive inclination toward the Tiani before I actually put it to the test.

Where to start? For all intents and purposes, the Tiani, is LELO’s answer to (knock-off of) the WE-Vibe 3. And it’s not all that of successful effort. I own a WE-Vibe 3, so I can’t help making the comparison.

The Tiani, like the WE-Vibe 3 is a vibe you can insert into your vagina and “wear” while you have intercourse. There are two motors — one in the insertable end, and one in other end, which is intended for clitoral stimulation. It, like its competition, comes with a remote control device. The LELO model is supposed to be sensitive to motion; every movement you or your partner makes as you/he/she holds the remote is converted to a vibration. Problem is this can lead to very intense or very weak vibrations at the wrong times. And herein lies most of the problem. The remote is supposed to be effective up to 20 feet, but it was inconsistent, at best, even at even 2 feet. And often it simply shuts off for no apparent reason at all. Well you can imagine how frustrating that is.

Another problem with the Tiani is its design. It does not stay in place. The inserted end of the vibe, which is supposed to stimulate my G-spot, doesn’t, or it didn’t for me. It’s too damned short.

On the plus side; the Tiani, is crafted from beautiful, silky silicone. But the silkiness of the silicone is part of the problem; this is what makes the toy slip out of place. It is, however, waterproof, which is one of the features I enjoyed the most.

Like all fine silicone toys, you can only use a water-based lube with this toy. But you know that already, huh? Clean up is easy with mild soap and warm water. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution.

While the Tiani itself is rechargeable, the remote is not. It requires 2-AAA batteries. That’s dumb! In its favor, the vibe’s motors are pretty powerful and fairly quiet. The unit charges discreetly and it has a travel lock too.

Take care to store the vibe and its remote control separately. Take care to store the vibe and its remote control separately. I didn’t and that was a mistake. The silicone on the vibe puffed up and began to peel. Apparently there was some reaction between the controller and the vibe itself.

LELO doesn’t skimp on the packaging. It’s all high-end gift packaging here. There is an outer box, with a picture of the Tiani on it. There’s an inner black box with the LELO logo on it. The inner box contains the toy, the remote, and a decorative pin all in foam padding. There’s a side area that contains the charger, informational book, sample of lube and the satin pouch for the toy. I think they should have included a separate bag for the remote, but that’s just me.

Like I said at the beginning of this review, I wanted to like the Tiani more than it was possible to like it. My husband downright hated it. And considering it’s whopping price tag, I say, you can do much better for less.

Bloom by Leaf

Bloom —— $103.86

Jada
My husband and I went away for a long overdue romantic get away. It just so happened that it coincided with our Spring Break here at Dr Dick’s Sex Advice so we didn’t miss anything back home. We decided we needed a little fun in the sun so we headed south to warmer, dryer climes.

We packed light; because we decided we would do nothing more than lay around in the sun, read, eat, drink and make love. There were droves of collage-aged kids in the area and they were whooping it up with wild abandon. Ahhh youth! But you know what? I think my husband, Bob, and I, old fogies that we are, at least comparatively speaking, had more fun than all the college kids.

One of the reason we had so much fun is I remembered to packed the Bloom I got from Dr Dick. This amazing vibe is one of the Leaf collection. It is a 100% medical-grade silicone vibrator with multiple speed settings. It is beautifully crafted, waterproof, flexible, sharable, rechargeable and as about as GREEN as a sex toy can get.

The Bloom is aptly named, because it looks like bud on a stem. I’ve never seen a more interesting or functional design. There are two motors in the Bloom, one in the bud and one in the bulbous base. The bud, or head of the toy, is rounded, but with a slight point. This design allows for precise clitoral stimulation. The thin area of the stem, or neck of the toy, is flexible, allowing you to position both ends of the toy however you’d like. The dual motors provide equally powerful vibrations no matter which side you are using.

The controls are super easy to use. The Bloom can be used in so many ways, internally, externally, alone and with a partner. The non-threatening design — Bob does not welcome phallic looking vibes in our partnered play — makes the Bloom a natural for when we play together.

Bob loves using the Bloom on me. I love using it on him. And because of its flexibility, we both love to use it while we have intercourse. Both ends are insertable. Bob isn’t into prostate massage, but for those who are, the Bloom would make a very nice beginner butt plug. Of course, because the controller is in the base, one would have to set the vibration speed before inserting.

The silicone is velvety to the touch and easy to grip. Use only a water-based lube with beautiful vibe. A silicone-based lube will surely mar the finish.

The Bloom is a modest 6.75″ long. The bud, at its widest, has a 4.25” circumference. Its lightweight too, weighing in at just about one pound. There are two buttons on the control panel, each button controls a separate motor. Each button lights up when it is in operation and the lights will flash until you reach the highest setting. Each of the motors can be controlled individually as well as at the same time. The Bloom is super quiet too.

The Bloom contains a rechargeable Lithium-Polymer battery. A full charge gives you about an hour’s worth of vibration, on the highest speed. The recharger is basically a cord that plugs directly into an outlet. This is perfect for traveling.

The silicone skin makes for easy clean up. Warm water and mild soap will do for general clean up. However, if you plan to share this toy, and it should be shared, I recommend sanitizing it by wiping it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too.

I think you can see that I am sold on the Bloom, but I would be remiss if I didn’t tell you about the beautiful presentation. Everything about the packaging is biodegradable. The cardboard box Bloom comes in is made of recycled paper. The look and feel is all GREEN. The box is fastened with a magnetically closing flap. Lift the flap, to open. Inside the box you will see a black packet, which contains the instruction manual presented in several languages. Below the user’s manual is a drawstring canvas bag containing the Bloom. The bag is thick and durable, excellent for storing this toy and keeping it safe. Under the canvas bag is the unit’s recharger. You can tell from every aspect of the presentation that the designers and developers were serious about the environment. Kudos to them!

Finally, I know that many people would balk at paying $140 for a sex toy. But I think if you do the math, you will find that a high-quality silicone toy like this will last and last. And because it’s rechargeable there are no batteries to be replaced. Over the life of a toy like this, replacement batteries alone would cost far more than the Bloom does new. In my estimation, this marvelous toy is worth every cent.

Almost Heaven DVD

Almost Heaven —— $29.95

Jada
My husband is a porn aficionado. He’s been watching porn since he was a teenager. Frankly, I can’t see how he can stomach the mind-numbing sameness of it all. For the most part, every thing I’ve tried to watch with him has been a disappointment.

Don’t get me wrong; I love sex. I love stories about sex; I have a fantastic erotica library. I love depictions of sex; I thoroughly enjoy Dr Dick’s The Erotic Mind podcasts and their accompanying slideshows of the artwork of his guest. But, for the most part, I do not like porn. I want to like porn; it’s just that I rarely see anything I can like.

I’ll admit it; I need a bit of a story line to get into the sex. I want the characters to be believable and I want the women in the movies to be more than one dimensional sex dolls. I don’t know, is that too much to ask for?

When Dr Dick asked me if I would consider reviewing one of The Romance Series titles, I hesitated. I wanted to do it, because it would be something my husband and I could do together, but I didn’t want to waste my time or his. I finally agreed and I stopped my Dr Dick’s and picked up Almost Heaven.

I was pleasantly surprised to find the DVD housed in a very tasteful, yet erotic package. The DVD comes in a traditional plastic package, but this is sheathed in a cardboard carton that give is a much warmer presentation. The promotional imagery on the box is suggestive, but not overt. It’s obvious that this presentation is geared to a female audience.

When I got home I tantalizing waved the package in my husband’s face. I said, “Look what I scored.” His eyes rolled up in his head and dismissed my find with a wave of his hand. I was crestfallen. He didn’t mean to be mean; he just thinks porn for women means toning down the sex till it’s soft-core pabulum.

I asked him to put aside his prejudice and watch it with me. He said he would.

Our date night arrived, we got comfortable in bed and I slipped the Almost Heaven DVD in the player. I hoped for the best.

Almost immediately my husband commented on the production values. The audio track was clear and balanced, and he didn’t notice any background noise. Apparently this is a big bugaboo for pornophiles, like my husband. I was just happy that a bunch of fake boobs weren’t jumping out at me from the screen.

It was easy for me to slip into the storyline. A pretty young woman, Angie, is told that she died the night before and is able to take only one memory with her into the afterlife. She chooses to remember her husband, Jake. But what memory of Jake should she choose? Another couple, Sara and Michael, helps Angie make the right choice. It’s a sweet concept. In fact, it was like watching a mainstream movie, but getting to see all the sex, which would only implied in a Hollywood version.

There are four scenes in the movie. The music, lighting and camerawork are all topnotch. Each scene is a sexual vignette featuring a different couple, but all the scenes follow the story arc. And ya know what I liked most? Condoms were used throughout. Kudos to The Romance Series people for being considerate to their performers and respectful to their audience. Thank you!

I was totally impressed with how the sex was presented. Despite the romantic overlay, this is a full-on sex movie, mind you — oral, cowgirl, spooning, doggie, missionary, all very tastefully presented. The chemistry between the couples is palpable, there is lots of kissing and the sex is hot. I couldn’t have asked for more. And I caught my husband adjusting his boner under the covers more than once.

My husband said Almost Heaven is not a porn movie for women, whatever that is; but it’s a really great porn movie for couples. High praise coming from him.

If you’re looking for a bit of romance and plot with your sex, this title is bound to please. It was just the thing to get our motors running for the sex we had after the movie. It was the perfect date night!

The DVD also includes trailers for six other titles in The Romance Series. There’s a Photo Gallery, a Behind The Scenes featurette, a very fun Pick Your Pleasure feature as well as weblinks. The Behind the Scenes feature is outstanding. It contains insightful interviews with the stars of the movie. They talk frankly about romance and their lives in and out of the porn industry.

My husband and I highly recommend Almost Heaven. The movie is exceptionally well done. The technical aspects are great, the sex is natural and real and there are lots of extras. You can tell this was a labor of love for all concerned.

Enjoy

Crystal Chic Wand

Crystal Chic Wand — $36.45

Jada

You’ve probably noticed that the Dr Dick Review Crew has had a number of wand type massagers to review lately. All of them have been a variation on the granddaddy of wand massagers, the Hitachi. All have that distinctive bulbous head on a sturdy shaft. This classic wand shape is turned on its head with today’s offering, the Crystal Chic Wand.

There is nothing bulbous or bulky about this dandy. In fact, it is on the other end of that spectrum. It’s slim and sleek. It has comfortable to hold handle, a bendable shaft made up of gradually smaller beads and it’s topped of by a glorified bullet vibe. It’s 11.5” long, but only 7″ of that is the bendable beaded section. By the way, it’s just the tip of the Crystal Chic Wand that vibrates.

The three-speed controller, basically just a single button, is in the base of the handle. The handle is also studded with six crystals (rhinestones?). It’s also waterproof. The entire thing has a lovely velvety feel to it and it is easy to grip even with lubed fingers. It operates on one AA battery (not included).

I was completely under whelmed at first sight. The Crystal Chic Wand comes in a cheesy plastic package that is decidedly un-GREEN. I was all prepared to not like this thing, but I gave it a go anyhow. Sure glad I did, because I liked it immediately. Once out of its ugly packaging I discovered that the Crystal Chic Wand is really fun and versatile. I admit; my first impressions were totally wrong.

You can use the Crystal Chic Wand either internally or externally. I have a preference for external; it’s just the thing on my clit. I did try it as a G-spot vibe and that worked too. What’s great about it internally is that it’s not bulky, so you can pinpoint the vibration precisely where you want it. I tried to talk my husband into trying it as a prostate massager. The vibrating tip is no wider than my index finger. But he declined; he’s not ready for even a little butt play yet. That was disappointing, because I know he’d enjoy it. So you see what I mean when I called the Crystal Chic Wand versatile.

I want to call your attention to the bendable feature, because this was my favorite part. You can shape it however you want and it will hold that shape. BRILLIANT! The battery compartment in the handle is easy to open and close. Just remember to tighten it securely to keep the Crystal Chic Wand waterproof. I used the vibe for over 6 hours on just one battery, which is pretty amazing. If I have one complaint it’s that it’s not very quiet, particularly on the medium and high speeds.

Because it’s waterproof, clean up is easy. Warm soapy water does the trick. I used a fingernail brush to clean between the beads. I also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution as I see fit.

A versatile toy like the Crystal Chic Wand, for under $40; what a bargain!

ENJOY

Flickering Touch Massage Candle

LELO Flickering Touch Massage Candle —— $29.15

Jada
I’m a sucker for scented candles. I have them all over the house. I once took a class in aromatherapy and I learned a lot about how essential oils, and other aromatic compounds can alter a person’s mind, mood, cognitive function or health.

So when Dr Dick offered me the Flickering Touch Massage Candle to review I knew I was in for a treat. I am very fond of my LELO pleasure objects. I reviewed The SORAYA way back in January and was so impressed that I’ve picked up two others LELO vibes since. One I gave as a gift. I know, how generous!

The Flickering Touch Massage Candle did not disappoint. It lives up to the LELO name in every way. Lets start with the packaging. It came in a simply elegant black box, with mauve and black accents. And all the packaging is biodegradable. The candle itself comes in a gorgeous black glass container with a designer silver lid. It dresses up anywhere you put it.

I received the Vanilla & Crème De Cacao candle, but there are two other candles in the LELO line — Black Pepper & Pomegranate and Snow Pear & Cedarwood. (Please Mr LELO, send us others to review!)

The candle is made from natural soy wax, shea butter and apricot oil. And because it is a massage candle as well as aromatherapy, when you dab it on your skin, or your lover’s skin, the effect is outstanding. It absorbs nicely, like a fine body oil should. And it leaves your skin delectably smooth and lightly fragranced.

If you are into sensual massages and romantic play the Flickering Touch Massage Candle is just the thing for you. My husband and I went to the San Juan Islands for an amorous weekend get away for our anniversary last month. I made certain that the Flickering Touch Massage Candle would accompany us. My husband liked the scent too. He’s sometimes critical of my aromas, because he claims some are too sweet or feminine. But he liked the Vanilla & Crème De Cacao just fine.

Flickering Touch Massage Candle starts out solid, as you’d expect. But once lit, it rapidly begins to melt into a pool of oil. I suggest burning it for about a half hour before you plan to use it so you a nice pool of oil to use in your sensual massage. Unlike a wax-based candle, a soy-based candle burns at a lower temperature so the oil is never hot, just wonderfully warm.

Once you have the desired pool of oil, extinguish the candle. Never pour wax from a candle while it is lit! Simply tip the jar letting the oil drizzle either directly onto your partner’s body or into your palm before applying. Then have yourselves a ball. We did! Once you are finished playing, replace the lid to keep the candle clean and retain its aroma.

If elegance and sensuality are your thing, I highly recommend the Flickering Touch Massage Candle. You will not be disappointed.