The Amy & The Chunky Rectangular Paddle

Amy — £30.00

Chunky Rectangular Paddle — £25.00

Gina & Kevin
Gina: “We starting off 2012 with a bang. Actually, it was more like a whack than a bang, but I’ll get to that in a minute. Right now I just want to say I am a total wood convert.”
Kevin: “Ditto! Thanks to the amazing craftsmen at The Wood Wang Workshop I probably have the happiest ass in town — filled up and roughed up at the same time.”
Gina: “The Amy (an adorable butt plug) and the Chunky Rectangular Paddle are our first foray into the world of wooden toys. And all I can say is; what took us so long to discover the ultimate in GREEN sex toys? They’re both hand crafted and like all handmade things they are one of a kind. No one else has exactly the same toys as us. In this age of mass produced toys, the realization that we have something unique is refreshing.”
Kevin: “I really got off on knowing that these beauties were made by British perverts. I don’t know why that thrills me so, but it does. The Amy and the Chunky Rectangular Paddle are just two of the beautiful kinky toys one will find on The Wood Wang Workshop. And, for the most part, you can choose to have your toy sculpted from any one of a variety of unusual and exotic woods, each with a different color and grain. All of the woods they use are forested from sustainable sources making their products environmentally friendly. You’d have a very difficult time indeed trying to find a more socially responsible sex toy company anywhere.”
Gina: “That’s true enough! But let’s not forget the pleasure these GREEN toys deliver. Our Amy is made from a wood I had never heard of before, Goncalo Alves. It’s so pretty and petite. It’s only about 3” long and about an inch and a half wide at its widest. I’d call Amy a beginner’s size plug. Kevin has several butt plugs, some of them are much larger than this one, but he says the Amy is oh so comfortable he can wear it for hours on end.”
Kevin: “Absolutely! I love me some butt plugs. You know the difference between a plug and any other type of insertable, right? If not, let me quickly clue you in. A butt plug is shorter and has a unique shape. The insertable part is often a tapered cone shape, designed for easy insertion and that delicious filled-up feeling while it’s in place. The plug tapers more dramatically near the base into a notch. This allows your sphincter muscle to close down on the plug keeping it firmly in place. Finally the wide base keeps it from slipping inside your bum. Pretty gal-darn clever, huh?”
Gina: “While Kevin quickly snapped up the Amy, I latched on to the very handsome Chunky Rectangular Paddle. Ours is made of cherry wood. Once I felt its heft, about 6oz, and fingered the braded rawhide wrist thong I knew I’d be able to punish Kevin’s ass in style. The two holes in the paddle leave very distinctive marks on his beautiful bottom.”
Kevin: “Oh yeah! It hurts real good. Like I said; there’s nothing better than having my ass filled up and roughed up at the same time.”
Gina: “I love liberating my inner dominatrix. I’ve come so very far from my innocent Catholic schoolgirl upbringing it sometimes surprises me. Kevin corrupted me and I’m ever so grateful.”
Kevin: “It is a real trip seeing Gina come into her own sexually and in power play. However, as much as I would like to take credit for corrupting her, the truth is she was ripe for picking, even when we first met. She’s taken to kink like she was raised that way.”
Gina: “Ok, I confess; I really get off on this. There was never any coercion involved. Kevin simply had to suggest a little perversion and I was totally up for it. Maybe it’s true what they say; kinksters are born not made.”
Kevin: “The Amy and the Chunky Rectangular Paddle are easy to care for. In fact, The Wood Wang Workshop artisans thoughtfully include a card with care instructions. Oh, and the Amy comes in a black satin drawstring pouch to keep it clean and safe between uses.”
Gina: “We are totally sold on these beautiful products and the company who makes them. These are quality handmade products at a very reasonable price. I also want to add that their website is a little tricky. You can peruse all their products by category — paddles, whips, dildos, etc. But to purchase the toy you want you must click on the SHOP tab and scroll through the inventory till you find what you are looking for.”
Kevin: “Note to The Wood Wang Workshop: we will gladly review any of your stuff anytime. Thanks for making distinctive and affordable GREEN products.”
Gina: “We highly suggest that you visit their website and patronize these wonderful craftsmen. Your support will send a strong message; you care about quality, you care about the environment and you care about pleasure.”

The Boa Pleasure Ties and Intima Silk Blindfold

Boa Pleasure Ties —— $80.45
Intima Silk Blindfold —— $59.55

Gina & Kevin
Gina: “We have two LELO Pleasure Products to tell you about today. Generally, we would do separate reviews for each, but in this instance, since the two products are companion pieces; we thought we’d tie them together in one review.”
Kevin: “Tie then together! You’re such a punster, Gina. The two products are the Boa Pleasure Ties and the Intima Silk Blindfold. If you haven’t already guessed these items are sheshe bondage toys.”

Gina: “The Boa Pleasure Ties are two 42” lengths of luscious 100% pure scarlet silk to be used as restraints. At one end of each tie is a lightly weighted pouch, at the other end stylish metal rings. This is divine decadence at its…well most decedent. You use the Boa Pleasure Ties as you would any restraint. Use them to secure wrists and/or ankles to a bedpost, or the like, for some lie-down bondage.”
Kevin: “You can also sling the weighted pouches over a door. When the door is closed the pouches keep the ties from slipping through, allowing for some stand-up bondage.”

Gina: “The Boa Pleasure Ties work like a typical two O-ring belt does. You make a loop around the parts you are restraining; the end is pulled through the two O-rings, then doubled back around one o-ring to keep the restraint in place. The silk moves smoothly and effortlessly over the skin.”
Kevin: “The Intima Silk Blindfold, on the other hand, is designed to offer sensual sensory deprivation along with your sensual bondage. It too is made of 100% pure scarlet silk. I have to say; the concept, craftsmanship and production values of both these products are exquisite. The attention to detail is remarkable. But then again, I wouldn’t expect anything less from the venerable LELO brand.”
Gina: “And while we’re talking about presentation, we should also say a few words about the packaging. Both packages are identical and in a word, elegant. Both the blindfold and ties come in a simple, understated black matte box that is encased in an outer box of glossy cardboard. The outer box features a stunning image of the product and it is embossed with the LELO logo. Inside the inner black matte box, the products are wrapped inside attractive high-quality tissue paper. All the packaging is biodegradable. Congratulations on GREENING your packaging, LELO.”
Kevin: “OK, so that’s all the good stuff. Let’s take a closer look, shall we? The Boa Pleasure Ties are basically extravagant playthings. They are not intended for a real bondage scenario. The oversized O-rings let the silk material slip between them with ease. This will frustrate anyone but the rank amateur or a silly dilettante.”
Gina: “And the Intima Silk Blindfold doesn’t actually work when put to the test. The design is very peculiar. It is a one-piece blindfold that has a tight elastic band in back. It did not fit comfortably on my head; it was way too tight. The curious thing is that the blindfold comes with attached ties that would have served much better for securing the blindfold to one’s head. Why it has both an elastic band and ties is beyond me.”
Kevin: “And although the blindfold is attractive, it simply doesn’t provide the sensory deprivation any true blindfold should. You can see light through it and it doesn’t cover ones eyes properly.”
Gina: “And whatever you do, don’t get either the Boa Pleasure Ties or the Intima Silk Blindfold dirty. Body oils, makeup and perspiration will ruin the silk. And if you should accidentally get lube on either one of these toys, you can forget about it.”
Kevin: “In the end, I had to ask myself; what is LELO trying to do here? These are extremely expensive extravagances that don’t actually work.”
Gina: “I asked myself the same thing. I mean, who can afford $140 for very beautiful, but frivolous novelties?”
Kevin: “I can’t recommend either of these items.”
Gina: “Sadly, neither can I.”

Cockring and Leash Set

Cockring and Leash Set —— $29.95

Mick & Chuck
Mick: “The Cockring and Leash Set came to us just in time for Halloween. And we put it to very good use.”
Chuck: “Yeah, but it’s not just a Halloween gimmick now, is it?”
Mick: “Right! You can use the Cockring and Leash Set Set any day of the year — Christmas, New Years Eve, Valentines Day, Arbor Day, the 4th of July, your pervy boyfriend’s birthday, whatever.”
Chuck: “Ok, I see you’ve decided to be a little wacky today.”
Mick: “The Cockring and Leash Set is such a fun and kinky setup; I think a little wacky is in order, don’t you?”
Chuck: “I guess you’re right. So let’s get on with telling our audience what the Cockring and Leash Set is, ok?”
Mick: “Sure! It’s pretty simple actually. There are two parts. First, there’s an adjustable black leather cockring, or strap, if you prefer. There is a D-ring on the strap to which you hook on the fine metal leash. The metal leash has a black leather loop grip.”
Chuck: “The Cockring and Leash Set is a KinkLab product, so you know it’s gonna be good.”
Mick: “Oh yeah! Listen, if you’re interested in buying a kinky product like this, even if you are new to kink; spare yourself the disappointment of buying any of the crap that is floating around out there. We’ve see more than our share of that shit here at the Review Crew. If you want quality, look for a quality brand, like KinkLab.”
Chuck: “Right on! So I was saying that we had a ball with this Cockring and Leash Set for Halloween, right? Well, here’s how it went down. We were invited to a totally tripped out party that we knew would surely turn into an orgy before the night was through.”
Mick: “And we were not disappointed. Chuck dared me to wear the cock strap under this flimsy rawhide loincloth, which was pretty much the totality of my costume.”
Chuck: “The loincloth barely covered his big fat uncut dick and balls. It was so fuckin hot.”
Mick: “Of course wearing a cockring like this made my johnson grow, which make the flimsy loincloth tent out in the most unseemly fashion.”
Chuck: “Mick was the hit of the party, I can tell you. About half way through the evening I hooked the leash on to the cock strap and started to lead Mick around the compound by his dick. This increased the pressure on the strap and increased his erection. We had a ball.”
Mick: “Guys were like diving between my legs to blow me. It was freak city.”
Chuck: “And that’s all we’re gonna say about the Halloween party. You’ll have to imagine the rest.”
Mick: “Looking for a little edgy sex fun, try a Cockring and Leash Set on your man and take the ‘dog’ for a walk.”

Leather Bondage Set by Fetish Home Factory

Leather Bondage Set — $ 49.88

Gina & Kevin
Gina: “We really scored with this Leather Bondage Set.”
Kevin: “Totally! But when Dr Dick sent us an email offering this kit to us for review, both Gina and I rolled our eyes. We thought for sure it would be more crap marketed to the novice kinkster. The Review Crew has already reviewed a bunch of that stuff and all of it was junk.”
Gina: “Yep, that’s what we thought alright. Neither one of us even wanted to make a special trip to Dr Dick’s house to pick up the Leather Bondage Set. That is until he told us we would be pleasantly surprised.”
Kevin: “He was right! This is the real deal. The set is handmade! Can you believe that? And it’s made of real leather. How cool to find a manufacturer that doesn’t treat his customers like they were children.”
Gina: “It’s true! And if you don’t believe us just check the Dr Dick’s Sex Toy Reviews site and search for ‘fetish’. You’ll see what we mean about packaging fake fetish stuff to the unsuspecting customer.”
Kevin: “So we finally got some good stuff and I am happy to sing it praises. Oh, and by the way, the photo to the right doesn’t do the kit justice; just sayin’.”
Gina: “The Leather Bondage Set is actually four pieces of handmade leather fetish gear — a whip, a collar, a wrist cuff and a mask. Each one is decoratively adorned with metal studs. Very cool!”
Kevin: “And it’s a unisex set. It looks as good on me as it does on Gina.”
Gina: “We’ve already been to two Halloween parties this year and we both had a chance to wear the Leather Bondage Set as part of our costume. Kevin looked totally hot last week in just a black jockstrap and boots, the cuff, collar and mask, with the whip hanging from the waistband of his jock.”
Kevin: “It’s not a big whip, just about 22” from the hilt to the tips of its 8 leather stands, but it has this very nice detailing, including a finger or belt loop. And you should also know that this diminutive flogger will deliver a stinging beating if put to the test. I invited Gina to apply it to my back before we went to our first costume party and I had some very nice stripes to show off at the gathering.”
Gina: “At that party I was the dominatrix and Kevin was my submissive. There was this other woman there who thought Kevin’s stripes were makeup. She blanched when she discovered my little whip made those marks. We both loved her reaction. I’m like turning into this slutty little exhibitionist and the Leather Bondage Set only eggs me on.”
Kevin: “The collar and cuff are both adjustable, so they will fit a variety of sizes, both male and female. And the mask is first rate too. A very sturdy elastic band holds it in place. The workmanship is obvious and again the detailing is very nice. We both love the black.”
Gina: “We are totally down with this Leather Bondage Set. These are quality handmade products at a very reasonable price.”
Kevin: “Note to Fetish Home Factory: we will gladly review any of your stuff anytime. Thanks for making affordable quality products and restoring our faith in fetish kits for beginners.”
Gina: “Yep, we are both very impressed.”

Weighted Nipple Clamps

Weighted Nipple Clamps —— $12.50

Rod
OK I’ve really got to slow down on all these product reviews or I’m going to have to take a couple of days off work!

Now I LOVE to play with my nipples; I love others to play with them too. Hell I’ve even been known to stand close to the only other person on the elevator just to rub them against someone. (I’m very popular in my apartment building!)

I’ve always wanted to try some nipple clamps, but I never got around to purchasing a pair. Imagine my delight when I got this set of Weighted Nipple Clamps to review.

I took a look at the packaging. I scratched my head in disbelief as I looked at the buxom lady model on the insert. I can easily see how these Weighted Nipple Clamps would work on someone with her endowments. But as I looked south, to my own chest, I wondered how in the world were they going to work on me. And get this; they are advertised as “Fully Adjustable, Non-Tarnishing, Weighted Jewelry”. Jewelry, really? I mean, who considers these jewelry? I wonder what my mom would think if she got these for an anniversary present? OK, I suppose everyone has a different notion about what constitutes bodily ornaments.

At any rate, with just the slightest trepidation I shucked my shirt and began to fiddle with the Weighted Nipple Clamps to see how they worked. The clamps are metallic with plastic coatings on the clamp ends. The clamps have setscrews that allow you to adjust the tension of the clamp. The two clamps are connected by a chain and the weight is connected to the middle via another chain that hangs down about 6 inches.

I didn’t want to start off in too much pressure, so I adjusted the setscrews out quite a bit and attached the clams to my nipples while I was lying down on the bed. The pressure was very nice and I immediately started to get a rise a bit further south! Thinking that I’d like to add a bit of tug to the pressure, I slowly stood up and let the weight start to pull on my nipples.

Given that I am not as endowed in the nipple department as the full-figured female model on the package, the tension of the clamps on my nipples was quickly overcome by gravity and the weight pulled the clamps from my nips and the whole thing fell on my toe! OUCH! Did I mention the weight is not insignificant? So after hopping around for moment and using a couple of expletives that caused the cat to run from the room I decided to give it another go. I adjusted the setscrews for a tighter fit and reapplied the clamps. This time the weight held for a bit longer before the clips slipped off my nipples. I couldn’t seem to get the pressure right. If the Weighted Nipple Clamps was tight enough to support the weight then they were way too tight on my nipples. And if the clamps were pleasurably tight on my nipples; then look out feet!

I finally relented and decided on less clamping pressure and no weight and had a jolly good time with myself. Overall I think the Weighted Nipple Clamps are designed for the more advanced tit torturer. This would be a great toy for him/her. For me, a novice, I’m better off using them without the weight. But who knows, I may be able to work up to the advanced class in time. I’ll keep you posted.

This sex toy review sponsored by Adult Sex Toys: over 8,000 sex toys and adult toys to choose from.

Bed Bindings Restraint Kit

Fetish Fantasy Series – Bed Bindings Restraint Kit —— $38.77

Rod
If looking at the packaging is supposed to tell you anything, you might guess the Bed Bindings Restraint Kit would be fun. Although, as a gay man, I would have preferred packaging that featured a well-hung and muscled guy to inspire me. But let’s not judge the book by its cover.

Getting the Restraint Kit set up is the first challenge, as you have to thread it under the mattress and through the headboard. But after you have it in place it’s easy to conceal the restraints by dropping them down next to the mattress to wait inconspicuously for your next play session. This insures that your maid, your mother-in-law or any other person that may traipse through your boudoir will never know about your dark kinky side.

The cuffs are made of a kind of rubber foam that actually feels quite nice against the skin. They are bound by sturdy material with Velcro for easy-off, easy-on access. My partner Eric volunteered to be “managed” first. I put the ankle and wrist cuffs on him and clipped him in. The first thing we noticed was that, even for the novice, these cuffs are easy to get out of. Then I discovered I needed to adjust the straps to really tighten the thing down. Once I did that I had Eric restrained quite nicely. I should have taken photos!

We then got down to business and I started a little feather-duster torture treatment on my spread-eagle partner and the squirming and straining began in earnest. OOPS! In no time, the flimsy construction of the Bed Bindings Restraint Kit began to show. The stitching holding the straps to the cuffs stated to tear as Erik writhed in tormented pleasure. At the end or our little session he was still restrained, but just barely. I am certain those cuffs won’t last for even one more session. That’s disappointing.

I should also mention the smell of the Bed Bindings Restraint Kit when it first comes out of the package. While not as bad as the Chains of Love Bondage Kit, it still had a strong petroleum smell. Trust me; this is not the sexy smell of leather. It’s more like the smell of gasoline on your shoes after you’ve filled the car.

Overall I’ll give the Bed Bindings Restraint Kit a rating of 5 out of a possible 10. It started out ok, but it’s not made to last beyond a couple of play sessions.

This sex toy review sponsored by Adult Sex Toys: over 8,000 sex toys and adult toys to choose from.