And now for something completely different!  Our next line of products will be introduced by a newcomer to the Review Crew — Christa.

Here’s the thing.  The exceptionally irreverent and downright blasphemous folks are Divine Interventions have cum up with a line of exquisite silicone insertables.  You say; “Ok Dr Dick, we loves us some silicone dildos!”  Yeah, everyone on the Review Crew said the same thing.

But not so fast, since these remarkable insertables are fashioned in a most unorthodox manner (to say the least) no crew member had the audacity to take them on.  That is until Joy turned me on to her 20-something goth-chick pal, Christa.  She was like totally down with the whole sacrilegious concept, as you will see.

Diving Nun ——  $59

Christa here!  I can’t believe that you’re just gonna fork over three totally bitchin’, top of the line, high-grade silicone toys, like for free.  And the fact that these babies skewer the whole religion thing makes ‘em even hotter.

So ok, I can see where these are not for everyone.  People are so fuckin’ uptight about shit like this.  But like I said, that only makes them more of a turn on for me.

Take the Diving Nun for instance.  This is a no nonsense dong, 7-3/4” tall with a 1-3/4” diameter.  This will fill you up.  It comes in lots of hot colors.  Mine is appropriately virgin Mary blue.  What’s so great about this particular dildo is that it has a suction base.  It’ll stick to the floor, if you’re takin it up the ass or to the wall if you wanna hands-free pussy-fuck yourself.  Now, that’s what I call versatile!  I had my way with this thing in the shower the other day and I’m still walkin’ funny today.

Baby Jesus Butt Plug ——  $35

I saved the Baby Jesus Butt Plug for my sub, butt-boy BF, Alex.  He is like this total ass whore.  I was the first girlfriend he ever had that fingered his hole and played with his prostate.  Now it’s ‘fuck me, fuck me, fuck me’ all the time.  This butt plug is perfect for keeping him stuffed and horny so that he gets me off a bunch of times before he does himself.  And I can just lay back and enjoy.  If you have an ass-hungry man in your life, or you are ass-hungry yourself and you’d get off even more by shovin’ an icon where the sun don’t shine; this is the plug for you.

The secret to the success of all these insertables is all the assorted nooks, crannies, ribbing and curves.  These are the things that will send you to paradise!

This Baby Jesus Butt Plug is 4-1/2” tall with 1-1/2” diameter. It comes in a bunch of hot colors.  Alex’s is marbled red.

Jackhammer Jesus —— $65

The ultimate in blasphemy!  Ever get in the mood to go like all Linda Blair in the Exorcist?  Frankly I hadn’t ever thought about it till I discovered that my Jackhammer Jesus is a silicone crucifix with a beautiful dickhead at the foot of the cross. Then all manner of wickedness crossed (no pun intended) my mind.

This beauty rivals the Diving Nun in size, 7-1/2” tall by 1-3/4” diameter. It’s not as versatile as the Nun, because it doesn’t have a suction base.  But the Jackhammer Jesus is even more twisted.

I suppose all you visitors to the Dr Dick site already know that you can only use water-based lubes with silicone, right?  I hope so, because silicone-based lubes will seriously fuck up a silicone toy.  Care and cleaning of silicone is way easy too.  Warm water and mild soap is what I use.  If I need to sterilize before sharing my toys, I boil the toy for a few minutes.  I also wipe down my toys with a 10% bleach solution and a lint-free cloth between each use.  But you can use peroxide or rubbing alcohol too.  This will keep your toys as fresh as the day you bought them…or in my case picked ‘em up at Dr Dick’s place.

One final thing, the Divine Interventions site sells a bunch of other insertables too.  And you’ll be happy to know that they are equal-opportunity blasphemers they skewer other religious figures too.  I’m gonna save my sheckles and buy me a Devil’s Advocate.